You Don’t Need a Heated Razor Blade, You Jerk

I mean after all, if the guy who took 4th place on Season 7 of America’s Most Talented Septic Tank Pumper is using a heated razor to shave his face on Instagram, then I should probably march right on over to Amazon and buy 10 right? FREE SHIPPING!

Starting Credit Card Debt (01.01.19): $126,310.77
Current Credit Card Debt: $109,045.60
Total Paid Off: $17,265.17
Income Going to Savings: 2%

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First things first! I surpassed 50 blog subscribers yesterday! I know that doesn’t seem like a lot, but for less than a month of blogging I’m pretty damn proud of that accomplishment!

If you like what you read on this blog, please consider subscribing and sharing the site with at least one friend today.

Thank you to everyone who has subscribed or read one of my posts thus far. YOU PEOPLE ROCK!

Now on with the show.

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As is often the case, I was rummaging through social media this evening, and amongst the pictures of food and pro-this and anti-that posts, I saw an ad for a brand new razor that is heated. It’s a typical hand-held razor, but it sits on this little charging base when you aren’t using it and when you hit the little button, the blades heat up as you shave your legs, face, or whatever-you-shave.

My very first thought was, “Huh… I’ve never heard of something like that before. I wonder what the benefits are? Does it just feel better, or does it make for a smoother, less-irritating shave?”

My next thought?

“YOU DON’T NEED A HEATED RAZOR BLADE, YOU JERK.”

I’m proud of myself for calling myself a jerk. Myself is right. I have gone far too long in life wanting to try the latest gadget, gizmo, or gimmick, and the result is very little cash left in my pocket!

The information age has brought us MANY really great things such as social media, job resources, on-demand news, dating websites (especially FarmersOnly.com, AMIRIGHT?), and cheese slices on cat faces videos.

What it’s also brought us is the ability for companies to shove even more worthless garbage in our faces than ever before, AND a platform to get others to attempt to convince us that we need to have it.

I mean after all, if the guy who took 4th place on Season 7 of America’s Most Talented Septic Tank Pumper is using a heated razor to shave his face on Instagram, then I should probably march right on over to Amazon and buy 10 right? FREE SHIPPING!

I’m trying really hard to change my way of thinking around finances and what I spend my money on, and part of it is for exactly this reason. I have to stop getting so caught up in purchases based on “ego buys” or on me being manipulated into thinking I can’t live without something. My current razor takes off all of the little hairs on my face just fine, and I have hot water if I want warm blades.

I’m not the most responsible when it comes to my carbon footprint (just ask my kids) or my emissions (just ask my wife), but I also can’t help but think about the fact that most of this junk is made from stuff that is totally wrecking our environment anyway. If you absolutely need to buy something made of plastic and chemical compounds, do us all a favor and buy them as sparingly as you can. I don’t need to cut my leg open on one of your discarded heated razors 20 years from now when I’m snorkeling in the Bahamas.

A life-long friend and former roommate of mine once bought something called an “Eggwave.” It was this little contraption (shockingly made almost entirely of plastic) that you put eggs in and then microwaved them to cook them. He used it once, it made our entire house smell like a fried armpit, he stuck it up on the top of the fridge because couldn’t bring himself to throwing it out after only one use, and never looked at it again.

I remember poking fun at him for it, but when I think about the dumb things I’ve purchased over the years, it’s a wonder I have any room left on the top of my fridge at all! If I had just saved that money and invested it, I’d have enough money to hire someone to shave my eggs for me.

Wait… I got the products confused. OR DID I?

So here is to the heated razors and the Eggwaves. You no longer have control over me you worthless wastes of my hard-earned cash. Well… except for that golf club you can pee in. I would by the ever living sh*t out of one of those suckers.

Have a great weekend, everyone, and remember to keep digging!

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